045: Mess It Up • Passion Design Project

Summary::

I’ve been fighting a lot with imperfections lately. I don’t like ’em. I’d rather everything get done perfectly, ahead of schedule, and be applauded by all. Are any of your guys irritated by the fact that everything you do isn’t going to turn out perfectly?

To begin, let’s get one thing straight. No one really likes perfect. For some reason, the idea of perfect feels really good but past that, carrying out perfection is stressful and basically impossible, and even if you do manage to, people then find it hard to relate to you.

Even as I write out what I want to say right now, I’m already fighting that it isn’t good enough, clear enough. I think I’ve got probs, you guys! Can anyone relate?!

As I’ve been following more people in the entrepreneur and coaching world, I’ve noticed that the people who get the most and best responses and engagement are those that share their struggles. I heard this quote once that went something like, “We praise strengths, but relate through struggles.” The jest being, we strive so hard to show off our strengths, thinking they are what people will be impressed with, except what people actually relate better to is struggles.

I’m not saying to stop giving you best. There’s a fine line here, which is mostly dealt with internally. And so we’ll break it down quick.

First off, take account of what you’re looking at as imperfect in your life. Is it what you think others expect of you? Is it that you don’t look the way you’d like to? Is it that you aren’t getting everything accomplished fast enough for your liking?

Instead of getting over those, I like to first think about what would happen if those things happened.

Say others expect you to have a new car each year but you don’t get one. What happens? First off, why do you think they expect what they do and what if they actually don’t have expectations. As we all know, and should remind ourselves, people think about you less than you think!

Okay now say you don’t look the way you’d like to. Is that the end all, be all? Are you going to remain exactly how you don’t want to look forever? I bet every single person in the world could talk all day about imperfections in their look. So be happy, you can easily find an accountability partner!

And now think about if you don’t get everything accomplished fast enough. If you don’t accomplish your to-do list, will tomorrow still come? Think of a time when you didn’t finish your to-do list. Did people come knocking at your door demanding to know why? Probably not or else you’ve got some crazy neighbors. But to think about it in another way, you would never get mad at someone for not finishing their to-do list, (as long as they are working at it) because you’ve got enough to take care of yourself! And if you’re thinking too much on what others are doing, go help lighten their load instead of discouraging them.

Now that we’ve dispelled the idea that imperfections are ruining us, let’s take it a bit further.

Is there anything you can do today that would turn your imperfections around. (As opposed to focusing on getting rid of them)

Can you bring one of your imperfections into the light by talking about it on a social media account or with a friend? Most likely you will get a sigh of relief from many people who have wanted to discuss something going on with themselves too.

Can you evaluate why you feel the need to please others and if it is causing you more stress than joy? Often when we decide to stop trying so hard to impress others, we allow a lot more mental energy and freedom to enter our days, thus making us much more exciting and easy to be around.

Can you treat yourself to something that would make you feel better about a physical imperfection? I’m not necessarily saying a bad hair day is an imperfection, but heck, a nice hairstyle gives confidence and I’m all about that! All of a sudden imperfections can turn fun.

The honest moral of this podcast is: stop being so hard on yourself! It benefits no one. Come as you are, and grow from there!

And on that note, I think my nails are looking a bit imperfect, so I’ve gotta go!

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